He Asked to be Forevers Much Too Soon

It’s strange for me
The sheer volume of humans begging for my attention
Yet I feel my heart ache
When our call got delayed, rescheduled, leaving a state of suspension

Left in the air
No time or knowing for when to connect
Practicing non-attachment
Yet I can feel the silences affect

Telling people no thanks
Strangers, friends, and other potential lovers
Pass, maybe another time, I’m taken
Yet it’s only me and Beasley under the covers

Am I making a wrong decision
Offering to be monogamous with a man
One I haven’t yet seen naked
And one where I’m not really sure where we stand

What about political issues
What about if our needs change
What if we never meet again
What if this isn’t the right energy exchange

It’s not like his trip will end
And then suddenly we will have quality time
It may be weeks/months
Before anything more meaningful than a phone chime

Maybe this isn’t what I want
I’m not a desert woman at heart
Why would I sign up to be a side kick
Or dedicate someone who will be apart